Dating is Miserable is one of the funnier blogs I read, and one of the awesome few I follow on Google Reader. Its proprietor, Amanda C, writes with much wit, and has zero qualms about sharing some of her more awkward and crazy dating experiences. And she appears cute to boot, which has nothing to do with her writing qualities, but is always cool to know.

Clicking about her blog some today, I discovered a post from several months back wherein she wrote about a date she went on with a guy she codenamed “Brohammer.” Leaving aside the fact that Brohammer is one of the greatest names ever, he proceeded to relate to Amanda what is probably the craziest first date story that I have ever heard:

Brohammer went to college in Indiana. With not much to do in Indiana he often turned to the early version of what we now call “dah intrawebz” for entertainment, mainly chat rooms. One day he met a girl online who was pretty much the female version of himself. After days of talking they finally exchanged pictures and after “about 10 minutes of waiting for the picture to download” he discovered not only was she smart and funny, she was also stunningly beautiful. Brohammer immediately asked her out, she agreed, and plans were made for dinner and a movie the following Friday.

He rang the bell to her home at precisely 7:00 PM as they had agreed and stood anxiously waiting to meet his dream girl. A tad surprised doesn’t even begin to sum up how shocked he was when a middle aged couple opened the door and greeted him with hugs and “Oh so YOU are Brohammer! It’s so nice to finally meet you!”. He was ushered into the living room where “20 minutes of the most awkward conversation I’ve ever experienced took place”. Turns out this middle aged couple were his date’s parents. “They just kept thanking me for taking her out and told me how nice I was to spend time with her. I was completely confused.”. Finally, the mom called for Brohammer’s date to hurry. Brohammer stared up the large staircase now no longer sure what to expect and slightly dreading what was about to come down. Which is why his jaw completely dropped when from next to the stairs rolled his date. Yes, in the course of all their conversations she had never once mentioned she was a double amputee from about the mid-thigh region and in a wheelchair.

The ending of this little tale is made of total WIN. I won’t spoil it, but needless to say, if a chick ever invites me to see her back yard on a first date, I will decline.