Dear Tim Horton’s,

I’m not sure how to break this to you, but . . . I have a new favorite place to write now. I can’t explain it — just sort of happened, I guess. It first started a few days ago. This very attractive table moved onto the patio in my backyard. It had a cute little umbrella and comfy chairs. Anyway, it was in the evening, and I needed to do some writing. You just seemed so far away, Tim Horton’s, not to mention probably occupied by annoying teenagers. Then I glanced out back, saw the little table, and took a chance. Before I knew it, I was happily plugging away at Lappy.

And no, it wasn’t a one-time thing either. Not just a fluke I could pretend never happened. I went out today again,this time in the bright sun. The umbrella kept the sun out of my eyes and off Lappy’s LCD screen. Again, the words just poured out of me in heaping amounts of productivity. It was glorious.

I know this is asking a lot, but I’d like to still be friends. I understand that you probably don’t want to see me for a while. But maybe in a few months, after you’ve moved on and stopped hating me (and when the weather has become cold and unpleasant), we could hang out. Until then, good-bye.

Sincerely,

Josh