My face looks funny now. (Funnier than usual, I mean. Har. Har.) See, I remember what happened vividly. I was trimming my goatee, the porcelain was wet, I slipped, hit my head on the edge of the sink, and when I came to, I had a revelation. A vision — a picture in my head. A picture of this. This is what makes time travel possible: the flux capacitator. and my hand jerked, and cut off a big chunk of hair. It looked utterly retarded, so I shaved the whole thing off, leaving just the mustache. Now I looked like either someone’s dad, an eighties porn star, or a molester. So the mustache had to go. Now my face is mostly clean-shaven, and I look like I’m 18 as the result. Fortunately, I should have it grown again in a week or so. Until then, I shall enjoy my newfound, manufactured false youth.

I was going to write something last night, but I’d had a bit too much to drink to post anything coherent. I went and met Sarah’s boyfriend yesterday after work, a charming fellow by the name of David, and two of her college chums, Suzie and Jessica. We went to David’s house and he made pad Thai for us. It was just a wee bit on the citrus-y side, but was still good. We sat around drinking, I believe, cosmopolitans and talking for, like, a while.

David seems like a good guy, so he gets my patented Seal of Demonic Approval™. Suzie is hilarious, and Jessica … well, I like her. Like her, like her, I’m thinking.

All around, even at work, it was a good day.

JAB

[Edited due to writing whilest drunk and not carefully rereading it the following morning.]