It’s Tuesday, I’m overheated from power walking at the nearby park, and feeling gross from the 32oz Gatorade I just drained, so it seems like the perfect time to point you towards several videos that have been amusing me lately.
Most of these are fairly recent creations; one or two of them are older, but new to me. Enjoy.
Funny or Die managed to get together all the guys who have ever played Presidents on SNL for a short video, and the results were pretty awesome:
Toby Jones runs several small businesses, and has created several commercials to educate you on his various services:
OK Go might be a terrible band, and their song “This Too Shall Pass” might blow a donkey, but the video for the song is pure genius: a gigantic Rube Goldberg filmed in one take:
There is nothing quite so fine as smoking the first cigar of the year. Even if that cigar has been in someone’s garage for several months, and is dried-out and brittle because of it.
Spring will soon be here, however, so I can look forward to smoking other, hopefully better cigars on future bright and sunny days. Cigarettes don’t do a thing for me, but man-oh-man do I love me some cigars.
Cigars: For when you want to give a courtly tip of the hat to mouth cancer.
Last Friday, Nate and I went to the Air Force Museum to indulge ourselves in school-style food at their cafeteria, a place we’ve been frequenting for ten years.
After a delicious if expensive lunch, surrounded by throngs of painfully young-looking high school students, we walked through several of the exhibits, including a gallery devoted to the Cold War. In the midst of this dark and gloomy exhibit was a hall laden with various phrases and images, which shone down onto the floor from overhead lights. One in particular read: BERLIN — CITY HELD HOSTAGE. It was very melodramatic in its presentation and I was quite taken with it, so of course we posed Kennedy with it.
Even bathed in a hellish red glow, she is so cute it makes me sick.
March is here, supposedly the herald of Spring and hope and sunshine and flowers, yet still there is snow on the ground and, according to Weather.com, the temperature is a paltry 35 degrees. By the end of the week, it supposedly is going to get into the low 40s, but I am skeptical to say the least.
According to Twitter and Facebook, March is also the home to something I had never heard of before, an event called “Mustache March.” According to what I believe is the official website:
Moustache March is the most wonderful month of the year, celebrated by thousands and thousands of men (and a few special women) around the world who have a true respect for the most elegant of all facial hair types, the moustache. Real men wear the moustache year round but we felt that taking one month a year would be our contribution. It doesn’t matter if you spell it moustache or mustache, we just want you to make March what it is supposed to be, a month long enjoyment of upper lip hair. One of our goals is to bring all the factions of Moustache March together in one place online to continue to grow together for our common goal.
I dunno. A Mustache March sounds like something a civil rights group called the Mustachioed Brethren might do to protest the discrimination against men — or women — who proudly wear the ’stache.
So despite my respect and empathy for the Mustachioed Movement, I think I am going to sit this Mustache March out. However, in January I did shave my goatee off, and went around for a day with just a ’stache. The results were thus:
Eh, it’s not bad, but most people going around sporting just a mustache tend to look like creepy pedophiles — myself included.
I met Sarah downtown for lunch earlier at 5th Street Wine & Deli. While we were eating, she said, “That guy over there looks like the dude from the Barenaked Ladies.”
I glanced over my shoulder at the dude in question. “Yeah, I suppose so.”
A few minutes later, we overheard another customer say: “Holy shit — you’re him aren’t you? You’re from Barenaked Ladies.”
The guy replied with something modest, like, “Yep, that’s me.”
Sarah looked at me. “I told you.”
He was with another member of the band, and some other random guy. Further eavesdropping revealed that they were in Dayton to do an interview at the radio station, and stopped in to get a sandwich.
It was very odd, but I am happy to report that neither Sarah nor I got all fannishly creepy like some of the other customers. That’s us: too cool for school.
The water cascading down from the chrome shower head in harsh streams was hot, painful in a strange but pleasant way, and made her skin feel nearly numb. She enjoyed the sensation.
After several more minutes of this, she twisted the hot water handle to OFF. The searing water quickly turned became frigid, and even though she was expecting it, still hit her like a slap in the face from Jack Frost. She gritted her teeth against the unpleasantness, enduring it for thirty seconds that felt like thirty minutes, and at last shut off the water.
Such was her regular showering routine, and had been for years, since the time her training had begun up on the mountain, in that cabin with no electricity. She’d despised it at first, but after several weeks of shivering under the freezing-cold water, she’d become used to it.
Now, she still just barely tolerated it, but could appreciate the immediate call to alertness it provided.
I think writers’ room for the show EUREKA contains the single awesomest, and probably nerdiest, wall clock ever:
For a better view of it, go to this post on the official EUREKA writers’ blog and scroll down. It should be the fifth picture.
Uncommon Goods sells it for $25, and will also include a cheat sheet for those of us who don’t possess Ph.D’s in mathematics from MIT:
12 – a radical 1 – Legendre’s constant is a mathematical constant occurring in a formula conjectured by Adrien-Marie Legendre to capture the asymptotic behavior of the prime-counting function. Its value is now known to be exactly 1. 2 – A joke in the math world: An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer. The second orders half a beer. The third, a quarter of a beer. The bartender says, “You’re all idiots,” and pours two beers. 3 – A unicode character XML “numeric character reference.”
I actually knew what 8:00 is — an illustration of binary code — so I guess I’m not a complete #MathFail.
Was supposed to go to the Pub with Brandon tonight for some good old-fashioned trivia, but then Gaia decided to once again fuck the Midwest U.S. in the ass with her massive frozen strap-on . . . and thus there was no trivia tonight.
So instead, I stayed in, read a book — LIVE AND LET DIE, by Ian Fleming — and made some dinner. There was baked fish and seasoned mashed potatoes — instant, of course — to be eaten, followed by the delicious sugar cookies my sister made over the weekend. In the process I kind of got drunk, which was unexpected, but honestly, not unwelcome.
Think now I might throw in THE ROAD WARRIOR, then maybe do some writing, assuming I’m still awake. All-in-all, not a bad night, considering the snow. SEE GAIA? I ISN’T AFRAID OF YOU. PEOPLE CAN HAVE FUN EVEN WHEN THERE IS SNOW. WHO IS FUCKING WHOM NOW?
